Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Don't Ask.....

So I had a really great weekend.  A friend organized a party that was an adult version of a backyard sports and it was tons of fun! I have noticed though that people look to see if I am drinking, it's not me being paranoid - I have had some of my friends come right out and ask when refrain from drinking "if there is a reason".  So, far sadly the only reason is that sometimes if I am not in the right frame of mind (good mood) and drinking can bring me down... it's no fun.  

When we are in a big group of our friends... and they ask: when are you having kids, any kids for you, thinking about starting a family, when are you guys going to start popping 'em out...? I have little patience for it now.  I feel as though I have been fielding these questions for over a year now.  I know they don't mean any harm - even though you really shouldn't ask anyone that question.  At the party I just wanted to have fun and not deal with the questions or the stress of how I will respond.   

When asked for the third time that day about having a baby, this is what occurred:

Q: When are you and going to have a Baby?
Me: If it were up to me, I'd already have a baby.  We have been trying, and we have a problem... that we are working on.  
Q: Shooting blanks, huh?
Me: No, the problem is me.  I have PCOS, and currently taking diabetic medication in hopes to help me conceive.  PCOS is a hormonal imbalance - it's been a really hard time.
Q: Oh.  

I think the thing with infertility is- it does affect so much of your everyday life.  Friends & family have said - don't let it consume you, don't like it take over.... if only it were that easy.  I try to brush off incidences like that, but they stick in my mind.  I know I have to let it go, but in some cases.... I feel like everyone is so intolerant, and all I want is compassion, not just for me but my Hubs as well.  I think it makes people uncomfortable, and they don't know what to say and half the times it's offensive.

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